Some random thoughts about Valentine’s Day and “romance”, both of which I hate.

1. There’s an episode of Malcolm in the Middle where Lois challenges Hal’s statement that he never even thinks about other women. Lois says something like, “If that’s true, that makes me look bad because I’ve looked at other men. It means you love me more.” And Hal answers, “Oh honey, I’ve always known I love you more. If you loved me as much as I loved you, nothing would ever get done. We’d never leave the bedroom.”

That notion of accepting you love someone more and being perfectly ok with it? That’s the most real, romantic version of love I’ve ever heard of.

2. I’ve never seen the movie Say Anything, but if a guy was going to stand outside my window holding a boombox, I’d really want it to be playing this song.

 

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows what’s best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes

I want a girl with the right allocations
Who’s fast and thorough
And sharp as a tack
She’s playing with her jewelry
She’s putting up her hair
She’s touring the facility
And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnng jacket……

3. In spite of being a dysfunctional unromantic beast I can be brought to tears by love songs AND anti-love songs (which are really still love songs, just to former or unrequited loves). Here’s this year’s soundtrack.

 

 

Just Give Me a Reason- P!nk and Nate Ruess

I can’t even with this song. I love it so much. I’ve been there, where there is no logical reason to go on with a relationship, and you’re begging for something to hold onto. Or, I can equally relate to it as a love song to someone with a mental illness.

Also, I just want to give Nate Ruess big hugs. All day long.

 

 

True Love- P!nk

P!nk does all the best dysfunctional love songs. When this one came out, I saw a lot of people on Facebook who really had a problem with the lyrics and I was baffled. I told Jeff it was our song and I’m pretty sure he’s refused to ever listen to it.

Anyway, the video is a bit silly, but so is the song.

 

 

Say Hey (I Love You)- Michael Franti & Spearhead

Makes me smile all the smiles. I think this would make a great first dance at a wedding.

 


Bob Dylan – You’re No Good (1962) [Digitally… by theUnforgettablesTv
 

You’re No Good- Bob Dylan

It’s not a playlist unless Dylan’s on it. I love to sing this one. (There’s a YouTube video of me singing it out there somewhere.)

 

 

Say Something- A Great Big World with Christina Aguilera

This is the first time I’ve seen the video, and I don’t love it. In my mind’s eye it’s a couple in the middle of a fight and one has just given up arguing… the other is trying to fight for the relationship but ultimately realizes the loving thing to do is to let both parties go on with their lives and try to find happiness elsewhere. Very similar to Just Give Me a Reason, I suppose.

 

 

Please Do Not Go- Violent Femmes

I’ve loved this song for so long I’m at a loss to explain why. It was one of the first ones I demanded my son learn to play after he started playing guitar.

 

 

Same Love- Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

Not my favorite Macklemore song, but the one I’m happiest to see get airplay. “No freedom until we’re equal, damn right I support it.”

Don’t read the comments. Just don’t.

 

 

Jesus & Mary Chain and Hope Sandoval

This song = my teenage dating years.

 

 

Take a Bow- Rihanna

I’m not a big Rihanna fan AT ALL, but this is a beautiful song. Full of hurt and anger over misplaced love… the video is pretty cheeky though, takes the edge off.

 

 

Gives You Hell- All American Rejects

Am I getting old? This video doesn’t make any sense to me. Great anti love song though (even as it smacks of “why didn’t you love meeeee?”)— pretty much every spurned teen’s fantasy to be have this song apply to them.

 

 

You Oughtta Know- Alanis Morissette

Still my vote for best scorned woman anthem ever. (Carrie Underwood’s Before He Cheats gets an honorable mention.)

 

 

Right Here Waiting- Richard Marx

Including this one as a present to my husband. Happy V Day Jeff! This is as romantical as I get.

 

Here’s last year’s playlist.

Here’s a tongue-in-cheek Valentine’s Day playlist arranged by BPM I put together for FitFluential. “Love” or “Heart” shows up in the title or band name, but mostly it’s a fun cardio playlist to get your heart rate up.

RedEnvelope posted a love song/anti love song list this week too. It’s pretty good (and I’m sharing because I had a kickass experience with them this month as a customer so they’re on my nice list).

 

Hit me with your favorites! I love new playlists.

 


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So Cindy of Whatever Works is throwing a party. A virtual Progressive Party, where house #1 has the appetizers, house #2 has the salad, house #3 serves up the main course, and so on. It’s a potluck with GPS.

Only in this case the hosts are Philly-area bloggers, and the houses are blogs. You savvy?

I just wasn’t inspired to cook for a crowd (I’m difficult like that), so I volunteered to plate some hot tunes for you all. And as always I bring a heaping helping of bad humor to the party. Enjoy.

(Song titles are in bold. Progressive Party recipe links are after the story. Scroll to the end and hit play to listen to the entire playlist.)

 

PPdinnerparty

 

All I Wanna Do is have some fun. So let’s Get The Party Started!

In my mind, this is how the party would go down for me and Jeff:

We’ve prepped for this party by skipping lunch- we’ve got the Appetite Blues. We descend onto the first houses and tear through the appetizers; the awkward conversation we make doesn’t disguise that we’re Hungry Like the Wolf.

Appetizers take the edge off, and we move on to salads like civilized folks. Forks and knives and napkins and polite conversation, y’all. Or in my case, awkward conversation. We munch our Vegetables nestled in their beds of lettuce and I mention to some random person how Every I Time I Eat Vegetables It Makes Me Think Of You.

On a hot summer’s night there’s nothing like a cold beverage to wash down good food and assuage the socially awkward fear of making more stupid observations out loud, so as we hit up houses serving before dinner apértifs some of us may seek out the hard liquor. Hey, liquor before beer, never fear, amiright?

Soon enough the pours and the conversation are flowing like Red Red Wine. First there’s a Champagne Supernova, then choices of Gin & Juice or Tequila. No one touches the Funky Cold Medina… yet. Look at what grownups we are.

I throw back One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer for the road. (Don’t worry. My darling husband is my designated driver as usual, and sticks to Orange Crush.)

Now, When I Drink, I fancy myself quite the conversationalist. The anecdotes and jokes fall from my tongue Just Like Honey. Understandably, you, innocent partygoer, are alarmed as I corner you with my wit and labyrinthine stories. You make as if you might take off early, but you Can’t Go Back to Jersey, darling, not after those drinks. Anyway, by the time the Dinner Bell rings I can tell that We’re Going to Be Friends.

The drinks continue to flow throughout the meal— we’re a fun group— and soon enough You’re My Best Friend. Par for the course when you have a group of friends and alcohol, we start reminiscing about the old days of our friendship, wonder why we don’t spend more time together, make grandiose plans for the future. We grow sentimental. La La Love You, man.

We sit in a Circle and talk about how you can Lean on Me and are grateful that you Stand by Me, but, you know. That’s What Friends Are for. By the time we’re singing about our Friends in Low Places and attempting conga lines to We Are Family, though, we recognize that this has gone far enough and it’s time to sober up.

Dessert time! “C” is for Cookie, and maybe Candy too. Perhaps a seasonal Cherry Pie? Not quite ready for the night to end, I sip One More Cup of Coffee with Milk and Sugar; Jeff has the Cold Tea Blues.

And then Candy Girl Kelly Brown breaks out her stash of gummy bears soaked in vodka, and I can’t help breaking out into The Gummy Bear Song, and Jeff is nudging me to leave, and I feel rude going, but he points out Who Says You Can’t Go Home.

Yeah, well, I suddenly realize it’s past 2 in the morning and maybe I was ready to leave anyway, Where Is My Mind. Jeff whispers that there is no need for extended goodbyes, we’ll all see each other again soon I promise, Shut Up and Let Me Go.

Or something like that. Maybe your parties are different 🙂

 

 

 Not a Spotify user? You should be, it’s awesome. You can sign up here. It’s free unless you want to upgrade (and not to upsell you- it’s worth every penny).

But since it has come to my attention that some people don’t use Spotify and don’t wanna: here are the songs on Amazon.

All I Wanna Do (Sheryl Crow)
Get The Party Started (P!nk)
Appetite Blues (Lightnin’ Hopkins)
Hungry Like the Wolf (Duran Duran)
Vegetables (The Beach Boys)
Everytime I Eat Vegetables It Makes Me Think Of You (The Ramones)
Cold Beverage (G Love & Special Sauce)
Red, Red Wine (Neil Diamond)
Champagne Supernova (Oasis)
Gin And Juice (Snoop Dogg)
Tequila (The Champs)
Funky Cold Medina (Tone Loc)
One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer (George Thorogood & the Destroyers)
Orange Crush (R.E.M.)
When I Drink (The Avett Brothers)
Just Like Honey (Jesus & Mary Chain)
Can’t Go Back To Jersey (G Love & Special Sauce)
Dinner Bell (They Might Be Giants)
We’re Going To Be Friends (The White Stripes)
You’re My Best Friend (Queen)
La La Love You (Pixies)
Circle (Edie Brickell & the New Bohemians)
Lean On Me (Bill Withers)
Stand By Me (Ben E King)
That’s What Friends Are For (Dionne Warwick)
Friends In Low Places (Garth Brooks)
We Are Family (Sister Sledge)
”C” Is For Cookie (Cookie Monster)
Candy (Iggy Pop & Kate Pierson)
Cherry Pie (Warrant)
One More Cup Of Coffee (Bob Dylan)
Milk And Sugar (G Love & Special Sauce)
Cold Tea Blues (Cowboy Junkies)
Candy Girl (New Edition)
The Gummy Bear Song (Gummibar)
Who Says You Can’t Go Home (Bon Jovi With Jennifer Nettles)
Where Is My Mind? (Pixies)
Shut Up And Let Me Go (The Ting Tings)

 

To get the full Progressively Perfect Virtual Dinner Party blog hop experience, click the links below in order:

 Appetizers

Salad

Drinks

Entrees

Coffee, Tea & Dessert

Here are the corrections. The only one that isn’t live is Sarah’s, but I am assuming that her URL will just be changed to today’s date (which I did). I’m so sorry!!!

Late Night

Decorations, Outfits and Music

Hope you have as much fun reading through the party as we did planning it!


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